Throughout senior year, teachers and parents of students probably at least once heard some of us say things like, “I want to drop out” or “I hate school.”
But never have I ever wanted anything more than to be back socializing and experiencing these last few months with the people I have grown up with before we all split off once we graduate ... well, if we even have a graduation. But personally, I am struggling to grasp the thought of not having things like our senior trip, our senior prom or our spring sports season.
As with every other senior athlete, I have dwelled on the fact that I will never play with the people that I have grown up with, let alone possibly ever play these sports again. I have played varsity volleyball and softball for the past four years and have seen and experienced seniors play their last matches and innings of their high school careers. I have thought about how it will feel for myself, but more importantly my family who loves to watch me play, but it has not struck me until now that I probably won’t have a senior softball season at all.
When I read things online about the “Class of 2020” and the sympathy the adults have for us, all I can honestly feel is nothing. I feel empty, I feel like I have no idea what is going on, like all of this is one big act. In my 17 years of living, I have never gone through something where I was told I could not leave my house and see my friends, or go to school, or just go out to do normal teenage things.
It is scary to think that not even the government can give us answers, but we continue to do our new daily routine of waking up to see the numbers rise on our TV screens and try to remain optimistic that we still have time.
Our country is struggling to maintain control of this situation, so how can I be so focused on missing my senior year; am I being selfish because I want to have all the experiences of a senior? I am thankful for so much but this was supposed to be my year. My year to finally get the recognition for all of my hard work, to be able to read my speech as salutatorian, to be team captain. How could I not feel cheated?